S01
Stop
Pause. Breathe. Create space.
Do I need to respond to this immediately?
L2M Coaching × Sawubona · Resource 05
The Sawubona Response Tool.
See the emotion. Hear the message. Choose the response.
Emotions can carry useful information, but they do not have to dictate behaviour. This tool helps you slow the moment down, understand what may be happening within you and around you, and make a more deliberate choice about what happens next.
Core principle
FEEL ≠ OBEY
You may not choose the emotion that arrives. You can develop the capacity to choose what you do next.
Often attributed to Viktor Frankl: “Between stimulus and response there is a space. In that space is our power to choose our response.”
01
Stimulus
02
Emotion
03
Awareness
04
Choice
05
Response
The eight-step practice
S A W U B O N A — from reaction to response.
A02
Acknowledge
Name what is actually here.
What am I feeling? What else am I feeling?
W03
What’s the message?
Interview the emotion before acting on it.
What is this emotion pointing to? What matters here?
U04
Understand the story
Separate the event from the meaning you are giving it.
What happened? What do I know, assume or fear?
B05
Bring in perspective
Widen the lens before you decide what this means.
What else could be true? What might they be experiencing?
O06
Own your response
Take responsibility for what you do next.
Am I reacting or responding? What is mine to own?
N07
Name who you want to be
Choose the quality you want to bring into this moment.
Calm? Courageous? Curious? Compassionate? Honest? Firm?
A08
Act with intention
Choose a useful next step rather than obeying the impulse.
Listen, ask, pause, speak, set a boundary, apologise or seek support?
When time is short
The 60-second version.
1
What am I feeling?
Name it.
2
What is it telling me?
Listen to it.
3
What am I making this mean?
Check the story.
4
What might they be experiencing?
Bring in perspective.
5
Who do I want to be next?
Choose the response.
Quick reminders
Don’t immediately evict the emotion. Interview it first.
Emotions are feedback, not instructions.
Sawubona means “I see you” — and that includes learning to see what is happening within yourself.
Use it with care.
This is a reflective coaching and supportive-listening tool. It is not a diagnostic or clinical assessment. Feeling an emotion does not make a person responsible for another person’s behaviour, and taking ownership of your response does not require tolerating harm, abandoning boundaries or ignoring safety.
L2M Coaching × Sawubona